The Beginning

Lets start at the very beginning. a very good place to start :)

My first oversea trip was one that was going to take me away from all that i hold near & dear, and for a rather long period of time. my family, friends, a good paying job.. in other words - security. and for what? why was i even contemplating such a thing?

Because the love of my life needed me.

I married young despite my reservations about early marriages (just look at what happened to my parents - shudder). i had planned on enjoying my independent single status at least till my late 2o's but there i was getting hitched at 21, just a couple of months short of my 22nd birthday. i had graduated the past year and was enjoying a good job. with overtime, at times i was taking home almost as much as what i'm earning now, would you believe that (the difference between the private sector and the government lol)!!!!

I was in KL

He was in KB

Anyways, we had earlier agreed that he was to pursue his studies overseas while i stayed on to fill up our little coffer so that we could get married upon his return. but nooooooo.. that was not to be. he came back after just one semester in new england on the sole mission of getting me wedded & bedded, before hauling me back with him lol. and to make matters worse, there were actually 2 of them. a friend of his was also hell bent on doing the same thing (unfortunately the last we heard he'd long divorced his wife and had later remarried).

The single life - 1st semester at New England College

Me - I wasnt ready, but with hindsight, i dont think i'd ever have been if he didnt pull a stunt like that on me lol.

Babah - weell, he was a bit concerned that Abe was kelantanese. it seems that kelantanese men are generally considered very capable of having several wives (but was such a labelling fair hmm?). i remember dad having a heart to heart with me about the matter. he was then the CO of Kem Desa Pahlawan, Bukit Cina, Kelantan (how very very convenient for me eh, hehe). looking extremely uncomfortable but determined as usual..

"Ummph.. you sure about this" he mumbled, referring to my rather sudden decision.

"Is anyone ever really sure babah?" i replied.

"Ughh.. babah tak kisah lati pilih siapa-siapa pun asalkan lati happy", he was a fair man and i could see whatever had to be said was hard for him. "And i dont have anything against the kelantanese. in fact most of my buddies are kelantanese tapiii..... most kahwin dua you know. its no big deal here".

Oh, he had such an earnest look on his face. babah was always very understanding and i loved him to bits. and i was after all the first to be married so i couldnt really blame the guy for showing his concern. my siblings through his 2nd marriage were still very young. i think he knew it was a lost cause from the start but he had to do it anyway lol. i could see he was relieved to finally get it off his chest. i had been warned so proceed at my own peril lol.

Mak - she certainly wasnt about to let her only child go without a long courtship. she went all melodramatic and didnt agree with any of the arrangement. furthermore, mak & my stepmom was never on good terms so having the wedding at babah's place would be a little akward (it turned out to be more than a little akward but lets not expand on that).

But Abe was persistent and before i knew it we were man & wife!! talk about a whirlwind romance lol and our wedding was also one of those. it seems that 'ku pujuk2 ku bawa lari' was a mantra my hubby held fast to. but it was also right about then that mak started hating Abe's guts.

The Nikah - 10/06/1983

Immediately after that, we found ourselves heading for the land of the free (& home of the brave, or so they claim). Newlyweds, without any savings whatsoever (i dont even dare call the pittance i'd managed to put aside savings - all this wasnt supposed to happen anyway!), except a one way ticket for me and his single scholarship for the both of us. ahhh to be young and in love lol. nothing was impossible. i couldnt get a sholarship because they didnt have quantity surveying courses in the US, i certainly didnt have the means to fund myself so i ended up starting my married life as a 100% genuine housewife.

The Reception - a month later

I admit to being a little anxious about the uncertain future but i never really had any roots growing up - being a soldier's daughter meant constant relocation, having divorced parents meant alternating between 2 homes and to top it off, those years spent in boarding school meant a certain independent spirit. so home for me really was where the heart is and in this case it was with Abe.

The year: mid 1983.

The destination: Henniker, New Hampshire.